stream of conscience, warning

man, its only because miracles still occur that i am able to sit up in this chair and write with a smile on my face. In case you haven't gotten the memo, its crunch time here at furman. actually, its crunch half, which means teachers have set due dates for tests, papers, group projects, and individual projects from here to exams. You think the furman faculty is out to kill you until you talk with other friends and see their sleep deprived eyes and realize that many others are in this same boat. i guess its one of those shaping things, that prepares you for the many demands of real world life after graduating from the Furman Bubble. This week has been one thing after another after another after another, with hardly time to breathe, which means waking up earlier and going to bed later so that there is SOME breathe time, not keep from breaking. My physics group project was completed about 30 minutes before it was time to present, and it miraculously went pretty well i thought. i mean, there were no catastrophes. My physics test went well also. and my spanish test, well, i turned it in and left nothing blank, i definitely had some creative, what in the world answers though. I haven't played guitar in about a month, so when i was asked to lead a few songs for BCM earlier that afternoon, well, it was a good motivation to play guitar again. and our overall meeting was really good, it was about confession. One thing i really like about some of my close friends here, is that i feel that i can be my real self and even though its right stupid sometimes, they still talk to me and hang out. I'm continuing to learn the ever depening value of close friends, and the power of encouragement, smiles, and hugs. If a conversation with someone of a card or some action of love and kindness and make my day and lift my mood so much, i realized what responsibilty i have. I mean, every interaction with a person can potentially either lift them up or lower them to some degree. I need to be more intentional to lift up.
i dont know if this is good or bad, but i learned that along with eating coolwhip and iceskating, baking helps me to not stress. I can be a very selfish person, and these times are just rotten, but when i occasionally do something for someone else, it helps put things in perspective. Instead of getting caught up in the Lauren Bubble, i see more of a bigger picture. People are lost and hurting and lonely, and God wants me as a Christian to go minister to them. My close friend who really doesn't stress out about things was telling me her logic, "nothing is so big and bad that we should stress over it except the huge amount of lost people in the world, and actually that should be more of a motivation than a stress.
my family is coming tomorrow! after class, i've had a "no study evening" to recharge my brain. its been so fun! Friday afternoon football was one of the funnest games i remember playing this year. for some reason, i felt hardly no pressure. maybe because after a week like i've had, i couldn't handle any more pressure and just had to pass it off, but also, Taylor informed our group that even though we weren't as talented as the other team, we would do well because we were gonna have fun. thats a good stratedgy. more girls joined the game too, which always lightens the intenseness, unless the girl is my incredibly athletic sister. but she just rocks at everything pretty much, she is super girl, and i've had the priveldge of growing up with her and living with her! ok, so after football, kristen spoted me, and for the first time in my life, i did a roundoff and two consecutive back handsprings. a bunch of stuff popped in my back during the second handspring, but i didn't die. it was so exciting. if you dont really know me, i still have some of my childhood dreams and imagination lingering of being an olympic gymnast and figure skater. anyway, then, i tie died a pillow case purple, our hall had a tie die party! and then... yeah, incredible, i actually went ice skating! it was my second time and super super fun! my first time was for my 19 birthday with my family this past august. i went with some freshman brothers/sisters and other freshman people i didn't know. iceskating is so freeing. some people helped me try to skate backwards as well as twirl. i watched one girl who spun really well. i tried to copy her. i touched the ground a few times, and looked like i was trying to fly to the sky at times, but its all part of the learning process. twirling on the ice is an indescribable feeling. probably not for most people, but for me, well, i love it. one day, one day, maybe ill be decent and do the whole jump in the air and turn that people on tv do. well, as you can tell im on my last bar of battery, and its flickering. nothing profound, sorry, if that's what you're looking for, never read my blog again. i would say i dont know how im gonna survive next week, but that would be major doubting God. He totally brought me through this last one, and so i know He'll do it again, just waiting to see how He does it, thats where the divine surprises of daily life come in. God is creative, and knows i like surprises. well, duh, i guess he designed me that way.
I think some religious scholars read way more into paul's mind than was actually there, but this is just the opinion of a little sophomore girl.

just updates:
im not anywhere close to halfway perfect
im not failing any classes
i dont have a disease or broke bones
im not dating anyone
Jon and Taylor's family group rocks
i still haven't seen all of the lord of the rings or harry potter movies
Handel was doin good when he wrote The Messiah. long, but great music
i still haven't learned how to play the dulcimer, fiddle, or harmonica
i have some crazily incredibly amazing friends
i love fall: colorful leaves, jumping in leaf piles, and coolness
i really look forward to going to my paul class
for spring break, i may either go to mexico with a furman ministry group, or go to work at an orphanage in honduras, but im not sure yet
im learning more geography facts
Laura Cochran is awesome
kristen has seen two snakes around the furman pond, so if you fear them, watchout
:) time to sleep :)